When it comes to marriage, a lot of people think that significant issues are the only ones that need attention. However, when you ask most married couples, they will tell you the opposite. The truth is, the majority of individuals believe that one impactful mistake will never become equivalent to hundreds of small ones. The latter gets often ignore because some of them are just not worth to become a big deal. But contrary to that ideology, people do not understand that most marital issues often come from small and seemingly unworthy things that grew multiples times day by day. Still, no one cares to pay attention.
Andrea F. Polard Psy.D. says that you have to open your eyes and make every day life magical, while you can. “Pay attention to your partner in the first ten minutes after you wake up as well as when you reunite later in the day. Smile at your partner for a few seconds longer. Ask how he feels. Tell him how much you love him. Listen carefully. Kiss and embrace him. You might be surprised, but this is a scientifically proven way to turn things around dramatically.”
Both Are Always Busy
When it comes to marriage, spending time with each other is the most valuable thing. But with all the necessity of doing a lot of things in the house, and trying to juggle work and social connection, getting busy becomes an excuse. Couples become unaware of losing each other in the process of trying to keep themselves with loaded activities. As a result, couples drift apart from one another without knowing why. In some unfortunate cases, couples become confused about their feelings, and their commitments appear to get affected as well. Yes, no one look at the matter as an essential factor that needs development, not until it is all too late.
Underestimating Hurtful Words
You see in marriage; there are instances that couples will engage in an intense level of argument. With that, one or both could inevitably express anger towards each other and might spit out some unnecessary hurtful words. Honestly, it is typically one of the usual things that happen every day for most married individuals’ household. But the problem of not addressing and tolerating the habit is the buildup of emotional and mental complication. As you can notice, hurtful words appear to be verbal abuse. But since most couples do not want to emphasize on that, they tend to ignore the habit. It is as a typical marital way that people can get used to no matter what.
“In a committed relationship, intimate communication often means revealing something about our own feelings that you’d ordinarily not reveal. It’s about taking a chance. Stepping out onto thin ice. And trusting that the other person won’t let you fall through,” as said by Dr. Stephen Snyder, sex and relationship therapist.
Not Helping Each Other
One of the fundamentals of marriage is helping each other out. No matter what the situation is, and regardless of how small and big the assistance would be, it is vital in the relationship. Unfortunately, lots of people put too much pressure on what both man and woman should do for each other. There is this identification of limits and responsibilities that somehow take the couples’ perspective negatively.
An example is when a woman works for the family, while a man takes care of the house. Society doesn’t seem to approve this; that is why it becomes an issue. Since there is this segregation of what is in for whom and what is not, there becomes an imbalance.
Regardless of how people should look at things, couples must understand one thing. There is nothing more fulfilling than being there for someone you love. So instead of ignoring things, try becoming more sensitive enough in understanding what might cause probable marital issues. “Problems are always going to happen, just as life does. Knowing you can face them together keeps a relationship strong and healthy.” said by Alicia H. Clark, PsyD.